Lesbian dating etiquette
Work is a way of test-driving a potential partner (ie getting to know them) before taking the plunge and asking them out. Etiquette: Dating a work colleague requires a good amount of old-fashioned social etiquette, not because it will make you any more attractive but because it will make the whole process a lot more comfortable and a lot less difficult, if and when the whole thing ends. Working with someone means forging an effective relationship.Better still, you'll be seeing them during the day, rather than just propping up a bar with them in the evening. Work together during the day, pop out for a quick drink after work, Bob's your uncle. Everything is in order, from stress-busting massage at the desk to on-site counselling, so why not pick a mate there too? Hinting that you would like to take things further but never being specific can make the whole relationship uncomfortable, especially if it's a boss/employee situation.Now, remember all those nasty little tricks people use to ditch someone will be absolutely no use in the workplace. The phrase "I'll call you" won't apply because you'll see their smiling face next morning in the office.and because of that there must be a rule: Sex on the first date is OUT! Think anything that will scare you enough to persuade you to wait until you are in a serious and stable relationship.Don't discuss details of moles, birthmarks or size of body parts.the excuse you present to your date for not seeing them again should be the same you give to everyone else. Be charming and never inflict unnecessary suffering.
There's no need to keep the whole thing secret, but never, ever spill the beans about what was said and what was done. Never tell anyone you work with what a disaster/rave it was.
Prior to making a play for a colleague, work out the following - however hard it is to be coldly rational under the circumstances: 1. Being positive: Surely the best move if you fancy a colleague is to ask them out on a good, old-fashioned date.
Do either of you have attachments - are you or this other person married/living with one another? Let them know it's a social thing too, or they may be unsure whether it's a meeting to discuss business.
This system obviously has advantages over night-time pick-ups in darkened clubs, holiday romances, (notoriously short-lived), or blind dates arranged by friends. High-powered City workers of the Nineties are accustomed to using the office as a complete life- support system. Making a pass is a dangerous manoeuvre in the workplace. Trying to blur the lines between business and pleasure will appear sleazy.
If your interest is not reciprocated you could be accused of sexual harassment or - at least - end up looking sad and sleazy once the office gossips have done their worst. How highly do you value this person as an employee/ colleague/ friend? This would entail getting someone to work late at the office and then taking them out for a meal "because it's too late to go home and cook" or taking them away on a business conference and making sure your rooms are next door to one another. Working well with someone means being relaxed with them - and that is impossible if you're not sure whether they're trying to seduce you or not.